Death is a universal human experience, but, while we love when students write about something universal for a college essay, death isn’t like other universals. This is because it’s almost always, and practically unavoidably, dark. Writing about other universals, like food or friendship, are assumed to be positive by the reader. As soon as they get a sense of the topic, they feel a warm fuzzy feeling. But writing about death isn’t like this. It gets depressing fast. Like literally from the get-go.
But it is possible that writing about death is the right choice for you. In this post, we’ll outline how to figure out if you are someone who should write about death for your college essay. And, if you’ve experienced a tragic death, we’re so incredibly sorry for your loss.
If you want to write about a sensitive subject for your college essay, send us an email. We help students write compelling college essays that lead to amazing college experiences.
Death and Society
The most common way a student ends up writing about death is sort of by mistake. They pick a topic that is tough and topical, like the Covid-19 Pandemic or gun issues and school shootings in America, and don’t intend on writing about death. They’re writing about an issue, though, that is integrally linked to death.
If you’re thinking about writing about a topic like this, you first need to admit that death is a part of it, and you can’t really avoid that. But it is possible to keep death from taking over the narrative.
To write about a topic that is adjacent to death without letting death take over from the narrative of your life and experiences, focus on what has impacted you directly. Either through personal experience with the crisis, or maybe advocacy work you have taken on in response to it, there is a reason you’re considering picking this as a topic. Write about the you in relation to the topic, and tell a specific story that broadens the understanding of you that the reader has from your application.
Death in the Family
We also hear frequently from students who are interested in writing their college essay about the specific loss of a friend or a family member. We are careful not to immediately write this off by telling them it’s a bad idea, because loss is complicated, but we do advise them that they need to be really careful that their essay doesn’t become a eulogy to someone else. After all, your college essay is supposed to be about you, and even though the loss of a friend or family member is life-shattering, their death may overshine what makes you special.
In general, writing about someone who you have lost is not a great idea. It is too easy for the essay to become about someone else, with you pushed to the side. Yes, the reader will still learn something about you from the relationship you had with the person you lost, but it won’t be nearly as much as they would have learned about you if the entire essay was focused on you.
The only two situations that are semi-exceptions to this are:
When the death interfered with school: If a death interfered with your academic experience, it may make sense to write about this experience as part of your college application, BUT in the additional information section.
When it can be a small part of a bigger story: If you are able to de-center the death in your essay, incorporating it into your narrative as part of a larger story, it may also make sense to include death in your college essay.
Death Doesn’t Need to Be Totally Dark
Writing about death doesn’t need to send the reader into a state of depression. It’s possible to write uplifting, inspiring, compelling, and even enlivening essays that incorporate death in some way, but without taking the leading role. For most students, managing this balancing act isn’t worth it.
If you’re set on writing about death, you should send us an email. We are experts in helping students write acceptance-winning essays about tough topics.